TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE, R*PE
Maa, I am sorry once again
I tried it all, I stepped out of the window
And tried to fall
Maa, I felt the warm air
And I had to take this step because of that pain I couldn’t bear
Maa, I took a knife and put it to my veins
It’s just a secret if I tell 'em' they’ll call me insane
Maa, I got played once again
You know the pain behind my smile
Maa, I can’t take it
Now in this life, I just can’t fake it
I want to go back from where I came
To this beautiful place
Where my soul can rest peacefully
Where my emotions can speak blissfully
Where my thoughts will actually have a place
Where I don’t have to seal them to not be judged
Maa, please let me jump again, I cannot do this anymore
I cry to him everyday
Now, he has refused to help me too
Maybe death is the only step
Maa, I am sorry for the pain you will have
But you know I have this kind of pain everyday
Because the inner me has died already
And it’s just waiting for my body to take a step.
Maa, yes, your daughter has yet lost again
I proved you wrong because I couldn’t just play this game
Just waiting for the approval from him
So that I can end it all
Waiting for that time
When I close my eyes
And it’s all dark
And that’s where I will feel death
But I promise I will look up to you till my last breath
I will smile because you are the only one who made me who I was
Maa, I choose to be weak but you had raised me to be strong
Maa, I am sorry once again, “I PROVED YOU WRONG”
Will you let me?
Maa, I want to run away
To this beautiful place
Where life doesn’t exist
Where I won’t be judged for my looks
You know a world, which you’ve heard in books
I tried thrice but I failed
You caught me once and slapped me straight
Why do you care so much, Maa?
I am actually fed up and mentally strained
Just let me run away..
I know you don’t want to lose your daughter once again
But I promise I will be happy there
I know you will cry aloud
And how depressed does this sound?
But Maa, I am facing something way beyond
It cannot be explained,
I don’t have the strength to accept myself
Let me just jump once again, I promise I will go away
And just be happy there
Maa, I know you will cry a lot
But don’t blame yourself for this, it’s just my thought
I know you won’t get over this pain easily
But Maa, death is the only option I have left
You’re the best I ever had
Someone who made me who I am
Maa, please be strong, I know I will never come back
But that’s where I find happiness now
Because I lost my soul which I doubt will be ever be found
I will maybe find it in heaven or hell because of my sins
But Maa, the way life cursed me for nothing I did
Maa, the way all of them grouped over me
And forced me to take off my clothes
Maa, this young daughter of yours lost her virginity just because of their force
Maa, they threatened that they’ll kill me and this thought of being killed is killing me more
Maa, the way that blood shed
Makes me close that wooden door
And jump off and go back from where I came
Maa, I am sorry once again
You encouraged me so many times but I decided to quit this game
-Tia Sardana
Instagram ID: @_tiasardana_
